Never Say Never

This is a list from last week - school vacation week.

The topic was:

I Said I Would Never...

...date a supermarket stock boy. I dated him and six years later I married him. Ten years later I have 3 children with him and am still happily married to him.

...smoke cigarettes. I wish I never started. But I really like doing it. It's a terrible thing. I should quit...next week...

...smoke pot. I have. I don't...only because it makes me paranoid and makes me hyperventilate. Not good with pot.

...stay-at-home with the kids. It was my intention to climb to the top of the corporate ladder and sit a corner office overlooking the city. I got half way there and had a cholicky baby. I couldn't leave him. I quit my blossoming corporate career to stay home with my miserable son. Best decision I ever made.

...let my baby "cry it out". When I had my first child, he was colicky. My father-in-law, god rest his soul, father of 7 children and 17 grandchildren, advised me that sometimes the best thing to do was put him in his crib and let him cry. I said, pompously, “I am an intelligent woman. Surely I can find a better way to help my child than leaving him alone.” Being a wise man, he said, “Good for you” and let it go at that. I later found that sometimes the only thing you can do is let him alone to cry. Then when you pick him up he is so grateful for your company that he stops crying.

...let my baby cry himself to sleep. When it's been 8 months and the kid still gets up 5 times a night, it's time to let him cry himself to sleep.

...let the television babysit my children. Sadly, I do it all the time - but not all day long.

...yell at my kids. My father was a psychotic yeller. I always thought if he didn't yell all the time then we would listen to him before he started yelling. I yell at my kids...have done it in public too. Sometimes they just don't listen until you start yelling.

...let my kids run amuck at the mall. When it's been a long, miserable winter or a long stretch of rainy weather, sometimes the only place a kid can run is the mall...so, Run Forrest Run...Run Like the Wind!!!

...bribe my kids to do things. A little bribery goes a long way. Sorry, if a piece of candy is going to get us in and out of the grocery store quickly and peacefully...a "peace" of candy they will get...and you will thank me for it.

...beg my kids to do anything. They haven't figured it out yet - but the kids really do hold all the cards.

...threaten my kids to do things. Just like bribery and begging, threats are sometimes the only thing that will work. On a Friday night, after a long hectic week, when all I want is a bottle of wine and a good movie - the attic is my best friend...they don't want to sleep up there with the bats.

...force my kids to do anything. Sometimes you know what they need better than they know what they want. Like swimming lessons. I think it's important they know how to swim in case they fall into deep waters.

...drink alcohol while pregnant. Doc said I could have one stiff drink every night. I had a glass of wine every night that I didn't fall asleep the second my pregnant ass hit the mattress.

...drive a minivan. I drive one...and I can't believe how much I love this beast!

...get a DVD player in my minivan. I got one...and it keeps the kids happy for long car rides.

...let myself go. I did...as a result of my last pregnancy. But I'm trying to get my old body back.

That's what I came up with in 30 Minutes on the Machine. Never Say Never...or You Will!!