The Tree in the Smoking Courtyard

I found this today in the notebook that I kept at the hospital.

The tree in the smoking courtyard is a very large tree with a very large and very thick trunk.

It stands - the lone tree - in the center of the yard.

The tree is stuck in hard, dry, dusty dirt where it clings desperatly to the barren foundation. It is clearly lacking substantive nutrition as it appears sickley and weak. It has barely any bark and stands nearly skinless. It is protected from the elements by only a scaley, pale, greenish-grey moss that covers it from trunk to limb like a psoriasis of the most terrible kind. Beneath all that crustiness it is a pale unhealthy shade of yellow.

The tree has many thick, loopey, U-shaped branches that rise up toward the sky. Most of them are broken...snapped off...midflight...ironicaly similar to the people that sit around it. Dozens of these U-shaped branches shoot out from the top of the tree's trunk. They conjure up images of corpses dangling calmly from knooses. It is a peaceful thought, albeit morbid, to think of being released from pain and anguish with a leap of faith and a quick snap. It is liberating to sit in this "prison" courtyard and imagine swaying with the breeze in this tantric dance with the breeze. It is a twisted lullaby mocking those in view with silent lyrical tauntings. It is a quiet game played with the smoke filled air.

The tree stands rigid in it's spot despite the gusting wind and pounding rain...despite the lack of sunlight and oppressive shade. This tree, seemingly at the end of the line keeps growing... struggling...to sprout new branches. It fights to stretch up past the shadows and into the clarity of the open sky above. It works toward the day when someone might view it's U-shaped loopey branches in a more optimistic way...perhaps as a fun place to climb or a nice place to a swing from seat.

The tree in the smoking courtyard continues to struggle silently toward the sunshine...immobilized by form but not defeated.